This week is a short but important message about doing creative work. The idea I’m going to share isn’t new or original, but it is vital. Here it is, in three words:
Let Yourself Suck.
After I published my first book, an inspiring thing happened. People I’d known for years reached out to me and shared their long-held secret desire to be writers. They asked questions, mostly about the mysteries of the publishing business: how to get an agent; how to find a publisher; that sort of thing. But eventually, the conversation would turn to the actual writing part of being a writer. This was usually when my friend would admit they hadn’t finished their manuscript. Or, in some cases, hadn’t started one.
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When viewed from THE END, writing a book seems like a tremendous act of will. But writing a book is more like losing weight or learning the guitar: you set a goal, you build a habit, you take baby steps. And, crucially, you allow yourself to fail.
Unreasonable Standards
That last part is the most psychologically difficult. Most of us begin to write because we love to read. We’ve read widely and deeply. We have favorite books and favorite authors who’ve inspired us, and to whose excellence we aspire. By the time we sit down to type “Chapter 1,” we’ve developed excellent taste — and there’s the rub. Our taste is far more developed than our writing ability. We’re not yet capable of producing work that meets our own standards; and of course not! Watching every minute of the summer olympics won’t make you a fast runner. Eating at the finest restaurants in Paris won’t make you a proper chef. None of us expects those things. Yet when we sit down to write for the first time, we expect to be good.
The truth is, no matter how well read you are, if you want to write well, you have to do it a lot. And to pull that off, at first, you have to lower your standards.
You have to let yourself suck.
The Two Voices
Every writer hears two voices: The Critic and The Creator. We can only listen to one voice at a time; you can’t create and criticize simultaneously. It’s a one-lane road. The problem is, when we begin, our critical voice is already strong. It’s had years of encouragement, gratification, and growth. The Critic can shout down the Creator with no effort at all.
We must begin by strengthening our creative voice. That doesn’t mean we have to abandon our Critic; we couldn’t if we tried. It means we have to admit it’s right — that what we’ve written isn’t good enough — and then say: So What? And keep writing.
We have to let ourselves suck. Allow ourselves to write poorly. To birth silly and terrible ideas. To tumble off the monkey bars, to slip while skating, to fall off our bikes, to skin our knees and bonk our elbows.
Eventually, we learn to climb. To zip around the rink. To balance on the bike. To write a paragraph that satisfies.
But first, we must let ourselves suck.
-Jeff
Symptoms of Being Human was chosen as one of 4 Must-Read Books On LGBTQ+ Experiences by Teachers College at Columbia University.
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